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Challenge #1: Dread and Despair


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#1 Kellen

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Posted 12 May 2007 - 06:33 PM

Chapter 2. Sorry for taking so long, and I swear I wasn't planning on that last part. Actually the entire last part just kinda wrote itself, and I had to reread it to make sure I'd really written that. :lol:

Comments and Critiques still welcome/yeah, etc.


***************

Dread and Despair
Raining


I sit across the small table and look at her. There sits Aphril, the sixth subject, a human female. She constantly looks from one place to another, and her breath is ragged.

As I speak her eyes jerk to look at me. It is only for a second; then her gaze returns to her demons, though I notice that not once does her gaze come close to me again. Interesting. ?Hello, Aphril. I apologize for not coming sooner; I was delayed.? And with good reason. I believe I have discovered the secret to Dili?s transformations. Once I have the proper preparations completed I will begin testing.

?But now we are ready to begin??


********


Above! Before! Within! Around! Behind! Beyond! They are here! They are everywhere! They surround us! They see me not! No! They do! They watch me! They fell my fear.

He speaks. They avoid him. They see him not. But he is cold, cold through the layers. He is cold through the veils. They walk not were he walks! They sit not where he now sits! He questions ? things forgotten, or meant to be ? but he asks. They look at me. They laugh! I won?t tell him! I won?t! It is meant to be forgotten!

But he persists. He doesn?t forget. He questions again.

Cold through the layers. They see him not. Yet they flee from him. His questions, the beginning and before. Meant to be forgotten, but? but not.

********


It was raining; I loved the rain. From the soft pitter-patter through the leaves of the trees, to the torrential downpours that nothing can shield against, rain is pure, cleansing. And when the teardrops of the heavens themselves pour around me, others hide away, and I have peace, alone.

That day, it rained. It was not a light shower, nor was it a great tempest. It was just... rain. With joy I cried out, and ran to the fields, to dance and twirl. Time has no meaning, not when I?m dancing, not when it?s raining.

I danced until I saw the flames. They?d come again. But we were ready. One of the adventurers had given me a scroll, a treasure I?d hoped never to use. But now was the time. So I did.

Perhaps I expected knights in shining armor, but I was sorely disappointed when what I summoned was really nothing more than the monsters it promised. They looked no different than the monsters that terrorized us.

But when I commanded them to repel the invading orcs and goblins they leapt to obey. Truthfully I was glad to be rid of them. Sometimes I resented being the only village wizard.

But as I watched the monsters did well their task. Soon the invaders fled. Two of the adventurers followed them, keeping to the shadows; that had been the plan. Their leader instead turned to walk towards me. He was handsome, with short brown hair? curly, and a dark tan. I was an innocent maiden, and he was a knight in shining armor? of sorts.

He didn?t say anything. He just nodded. I blushed; yes, I was a blushing maiden. He noticed and grinned, and I smiled back, shyly. With another nod he turned and started in the direction of the fleeing brutes that?d attacked our village. I?ll admit I followed? because of him.

Magic sparked my interest, but he? he intrigued me. And I followed my knight in shining armor. It began, while it was raining.

Edited by Kellen, 13 May 2007 - 06:57 PM.

"She could resist temptation. Really she could. Sometimes. At least when it wasn't tempting." - Calli Slythistle
"She was a fire, and I had no doubt that she had already done her share of burning." - Lord Firael Algathrin
"Most assume that all the followers of Lathander are great morning people. They're very wrong." - Tanek of Cloakwood

we are all adults playing a fantasy together, - cmorgan

#2 Celestine

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Posted 13 May 2007 - 07:09 PM

So sweet, and a good, refreshing reason to follow the adventurers.

#3 Kellen

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Posted 13 May 2007 - 07:54 PM

So sweet, and a good, refreshing reason to follow the adventurers.

Yes, refreshing. I'm a blushing maiden following a 'knight in shining armor.' 'Cept his armor ain't so shiney and his conduct ain't so knighty...

But that's the next chapter, which I'm happy to say I'm working on. So happy! Writing streak! Don't stop!

So thanks for the comment, and I'll get back to writing, or go to bed, but probably the writing. Maybe some water first...

Yes, but soon I will do something.
"She could resist temptation. Really she could. Sometimes. At least when it wasn't tempting." - Calli Slythistle
"She was a fire, and I had no doubt that she had already done her share of burning." - Lord Firael Algathrin
"Most assume that all the followers of Lathander are great morning people. They're very wrong." - Tanek of Cloakwood

we are all adults playing a fantasy together, - cmorgan

#4 Celestine

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Posted 13 May 2007 - 08:31 PM

Yeah, stop procrastinating, writing will be my choice but then its only noon here.

#5 Kellen

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Posted 13 May 2007 - 08:33 PM

Okay, I'm going with the bed option now. But I wrote about half a page first. ;)

Get to work Celestine. I want to see an entry from you.
"She could resist temptation. Really she could. Sometimes. At least when it wasn't tempting." - Calli Slythistle
"She was a fire, and I had no doubt that she had already done her share of burning." - Lord Firael Algathrin
"Most assume that all the followers of Lathander are great morning people. They're very wrong." - Tanek of Cloakwood

we are all adults playing a fantasy together, - cmorgan

#6 Celestine

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Posted 13 May 2007 - 08:48 PM

I would if I could find my muse but lately I've been too distracted to focus on anything, much less writing. Maybe for the next challenge topic. =) sweet dreams, Kellen.

Edited by Celestine, 13 May 2007 - 08:49 PM.
typo


#7 Kellen

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Posted 14 May 2007 - 05:53 AM

:hug: Here's hoping that you find it soon. It sucks so much when your muse vanishes on you.
"She could resist temptation. Really she could. Sometimes. At least when it wasn't tempting." - Calli Slythistle
"She was a fire, and I had no doubt that she had already done her share of burning." - Lord Firael Algathrin
"Most assume that all the followers of Lathander are great morning people. They're very wrong." - Tanek of Cloakwood

we are all adults playing a fantasy together, - cmorgan

#8 DalreïDal

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Posted 14 May 2007 - 07:45 AM

Ah... so now the series expands... Very well-written, short and to the point, and with a reason to want to read the next chapter too :)

Are we there yet?
"I set on this journey trying to understand why has metal been stereotyped, dismissed, and condemned. My answer is this: if, listening to that music, you don't get that overwhelming rush of power that makes the hair stand at the back of your neck, you may never will. But you know what, it doesn't really matter. Because, judging from the 40 000 people around me, we're doing just fine without ya." :) Cheers! And two horns up for metalheads all around the world!

#9 Kellen

Kellen

    Earn a person's heart, and they'll die a thousand deaths

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Posted 14 May 2007 - 08:00 AM

I'm writing as yet untitled chapter 3 as we speak. Well not quite as we speak, because we're typing and I'd have to be typing in two places to be doing that. I'm not quite that talented.

Glad you liked it.
"She could resist temptation. Really she could. Sometimes. At least when it wasn't tempting." - Calli Slythistle
"She was a fire, and I had no doubt that she had already done her share of burning." - Lord Firael Algathrin
"Most assume that all the followers of Lathander are great morning people. They're very wrong." - Tanek of Cloakwood

we are all adults playing a fantasy together, - cmorgan