For your own enjoyment it's very easy - it's a matter of checking the required variables (if they match the classics, probably something like Rasaadmatch 1) set if your Charname is eligible and then setting them manually via the console. Of course that won't get you rid of pronouns and the occasional odd interaction, although it shouldn't break anything. Properly modding it is more difficult, as you'd essentially have to replicate the entire romance track with adjusted variables, conflict checks and dialog.tlk strings. Probably not quite worth the effort unless you are already familiar with IE scripting - you could look at the Viconia Friendship mod for an example on how to do it (being the only od to my knoowledge which overhauls one of the original NPCs storylines to be available to either gender).
I've done a bit of that before through EEKeeper, so I know it's easy enough, though yeah, not a big fan of being referred to as female regardless
And yeah, I understand it's a pretty involved process, on top of me really having no idea where to start (so thanks for pointing that Vic mod out) but if I don't probably no one else will If I can hopefully see this through it will have all been worth it.